IS THAT THE HELP DESK?

 

• User's new notebook PC has a wireless network card. He loves it - for a day or so, until the battery goes dead. "Did you plug it into a power outlet to charge it?" asks systems administrator. "No," says sales guy impatiently. "It's wireless, why would I?"
• Accounting department reports that the backup tape for a server won't stay in. Tech geek tries, and runs a backup without a problem - but the next day the complaint is back. "We asked them to show us the problem, but they were too busy to stop and work with us," tech says. "This went on for weeks until accounting submitted a purchase order to hire a consultant. He came out and watched as our accountant inserted a cleaning tape into the drive - and a few seconds later it popped out. Consultant made a big label that said CLEANING TAPE, explained to the accountant that she needs to back up her data on one of the tapes that does not say CLEANING TAPE on it, and billed us $150."
• Help desk worker gets a puzzling question from a user: Can she send e-mail to a company in the U.K.? She explained that she tried to e-mail some people in the U.K. and the e-mail came back. She was under the impression that e-mail was like the phone system, and since she couldn't make an international call, she couldn't send an international e-mail."
• I can't connect with the network, remote user tells help desk. "After several minutes of troubleshooting, it was clear that the problem was the user's modem, which basically died," tech reports. Impatient user's next question: "Where can I download another modem?"
• User's PC hard drive is damaged, but support tech manages to recover the files in key directories and copies them to a new drive. Still, user is furious: "Where the @#$%! are all my files?" “Where were the files that are missing now?” technician asks. "I used to save them in that cute can. I use those files a lot, and that icon says 'Recycle,' so I thought it was a good place to put the files that I reuse often."
• Newly hired user to IT manager: "My mouse pad is missing. Do you have another?" No, but you can get an office supply catalogue from purchasing, pick out one you like and have them order it. New hire leaves, only to return minutes later: "My boss says you have to order me a mouse pad. She says you're the only one who knows what kind is compatible with our system."
• Power user creates an image of his signature to be added automatically to his outgoing e-mails. Other users see it and ask for his help creating their own. "One day, I get a message from a clueless user, asking to have a signature created for her e-mail." I replied back with mine showing, and asked her if she would like one similar to mine. Her reply? "No, I want my name on it."
• Trouble ticket: "When my computer is turned on, the person sitting behind me gets shocked. My computer makes a buzzing noise, and then she yells. Please help." Support crewmember can't find the problem with the PC, but he does get an additional request from the user at the next desk back: "If you can't fix it, can you at least make it shock somebody else?"
• User says: "My monitor did not pass the drop test during our department move. I would like to get another one."
• New user calls support staff early one morning, complaining that his computer won't power up even though everything is plugged in just as it was the night before. Tech walks down to check it out, finds the user pressing the power button on his empty laptop docking station. Tech asks: "Where's the laptop?" User: "I left that at home. Do I need that to get on my computer here?"